Live Chat

Jonathan Kesselman, the writer and director of "The Hebrew Hammer," chatted online with students on Tuesday, Nov. 9 at 7pm EST. Participants learned more about the making of the movie and its role in confronting Jewish stereotypes.

Hillel: We welcome Jonathan Kesselman, the writer and director of "The Hebrew Hammer," to tonight's Web chat. He is here to answer your questions about the making of the movie, its role in confronting Jewish stereotypes and anything else you want to know!

Question: Were there any illegal substances involved in conceiving this movie?

Kesselman: Is it illegal to drink 5 or 6 cups of Starbucks coffee in a day? If not, it should be. I had the runs for weeks.

Question: Why did you make a movie about Chanukah, considering it is a relatively minor Jewish holiday? Why didn't the Hammer save Passover from an evil Easter bunny? Bunnies can be very treacherous, you know, particularly if you lack a holy hand grenade.

Kesselman: I needed a holiday that the goyim could understand. For some reason, they get all touchy when you get into the whole killing of their firstborn thing.

Question: People say you are trafficking in negative Jewish stereotypes. Does that worry you? How do you respond?

Kesselman: The term trafficking connotes that I actually made money.

Question: Is there going to be a sequel?

Kesselman: From your lips to God's ears. If everyone out there buys the DVD, and the movie does well, then you bet. With that in mind, I know a lot of you are going to be looking for the movie on some P2P site. No guilt, but if you do that, you'll single-handedly destroy any chance for a sequel to exist, and you'll also force me to become a penniless, homeless double amputee who will live in a urine soaked cardboard box. Thanks.

Question: What's the point of the movie?

Kesselman: You'll need to buy 10 separate DVD's and play them all at the same time to find out.

Question: Is Hammer observant or not? How can he be observant, sleep with his girlfriend and get a tattoo?

Kesselman: Yes and no. It's the same way he that he can drink a glass of water with no hands, pat his tummy and head simultaneously, and also play the violin with his toes.

Question: Were you the only Jewish kid in school, like the Hebrew Hammer, or did you grow up in a large Jewish community?

Kesselman: I grew up in Los Angeles. We had a couple Jews here.

Question: Are you working on any new movies?

Kesselman: Yes. I'm close to getting financing on a movie called 'It's A Man's World.' Adam Goldberg and Christina Ricci are going to star in it.

Question: Which directors do you respect most?

Kesselman: My mother instilled me with a sense of self-importance that makes it nearly impossible to recognize that there are any other filmmakers out there aside from me.

Question: Have you been surprised by audience reaction to Hammer?

Kesselman: I didn't expect to be deified at such a young age. That was really more part of my ten year plan.

Question: What was your mother's reaction when she first saw the movie?

Kesselman: She had a little nachas, followed by some indigestion.

Question: Were you aiming to reach a primarily Jewish audience or everyone? It seems that people unfamiliar with Yiddishkeit wouldn't get as much out of it.

Kesselman: I wanted to make a movie for people who shared my brilliant sense of humor. I succeeded wildly.

Question: Before he met Esther, did the Hammer try Jdate?

Kesselman: The Hammer using J-Date would be as unnecessary as John Shaft having to use the LA Weekly Personals section to get a date.

Question: How did you pick the actors? Did anyone turn down a role?

Kesselman: Initially, I offered Mel Gibson the part of the Hammer, but apparently he had some sort of scheduling conflict.

Question: Does Hammer live in a Red State or a Blue State?

Kesselman: Does this poll take into account any tampering by Karl Rove and the Bush Administration?

Question: Do you think that Blacks and Jews really have that much in common?

Kesselman: We both have nappy hair and like chicken. What else can I say?

Question: How did you come up with the immortal line: "Shabbat Shalom motherf*&%er?" and why "Shabbat Shalom"?

Kesselman: Originally, the line was, "Hey you mean looking skinhead people, stop it! Stop bothering me!" After I wrote that, I realized it was probably a bit too long and clunky, so I changed it to 'Shabbat Shalom, Motherf*&%ers!"

Question: What's up with the Asian guy? Is he the mom's boyfriend? And why the sick cat?

Kesselman: Any given holiday, my mom would invite random foreign people off the street to see how "Jews celebrated" in America.

My sister had a cat named Winnie that went to the groomers late in life, and came back paralyzed from the waist down. My sister kept it alive for a year or so. She even bought it a little cart to scoot around in. One night, we were all in the kitchen, and the cat swished its way towards across the hard wood floors, and I told myself that had to go in a movie somewhere. Eventually, she put it down. In her house is still a painted portrait of Winnie. It's strange, I know.

Question: The movie seems to asert Jewish male power as a responce to a feeling of powerlessness and impotence. Was this intentional?

Kesselman: As a writer, you're taught to write what you know. Being an incredibly masculine, powerful, SINGLE Jewish male, I just wrote me.

Question: What's next for the hebrew hammer? Is he going to save Purim? EC, LA

Kesselman: I'm thinking about a time travel movie simply for the fact that I'd like to have a scene in which the Hammer travels back to Auschwitz and screws up the program.

Question: Why do you think people take offense to good natured humor?

Kesselman: Because they lack a sense of irony.

Question: So exactly how does a DVD get made and how vitally important is a DVD Producer?

Kesselman: A DVD producer, as most producers, are useless. They just get in the way. I'm just kidding. Our DVD producer, Steve Raizes was incredible. And good looking, and talented. And he's monitoring this chat right now. Hi Steve!

Question: What do you think Yassir Arafat thinks of the Hebrew Hammer? Do you think they're keeping him alive long enough to see the DVD release?

Kesselman: :)

I think he heard the DVD was coming out, and suddenly "got sick." Yassir, if you're up and about, and happen to be online at this chat, I just want to say I could really use some of that money you got socked away in those Swiss accounts.

Question: When does the DVD come out and what's different from what was on Comedy Central? Any cool bonus stuff? Steve, Boston

Kesselman:The DVD is coming out next Tuesday, Nov. 16th. It is the un-circumcised version of the film. Comedy Central cut a bunch of very funny stuff and bleeped the film. In terms of bonus stuff, it's got deleted scenes, a gag reel, my original student film, a commentary track with Adam Goldberg, my Mom, my brother, and myself. It's a pretty damn cool DVD that I'm very proud of.

Question: I want to be the Hebrew Hammer for Halloween - what do I do? Scott, Iowa

Kesselman: Good question Scott. Buy a Fedora, some black leather, and put a sock in your pants. Lastly,you're going to need some big, black Gentile stomping boots, and a Chai to top off the costume.

BTW, I might as well be self-serving here, but Manischewitz (on all of their food packaging in stores now) has coupons for the Hammer DVD.

Question: Who did the Hebrew Hammer vote for? Jason, Sioux Falls

Kesselman: Not the guy currently in office.

Question: How do you feel about dating non-Jewish girls? What about girls from Sweden?

Kesselman: I am a Jew of the people. I don't discriminate when it comes to dating non-Jews.

Question: How was Comedy Central to work with? Why do they call their network "Comedy" Central?

Kesselman: Comedy Central was actually great to work with. Very supportive, and they've done an amazing job on the DVD. Now that they've put my movie out, they have earned the right to use the term "Comedy" in their branding. I think initially, they were just called "Central," and then South Park came out. Then they changed their name to "South Park Central" for many, many years.

Question: What advice do you have for students interested in getting into the movie business? Is it as bad as they say it is? Ben, Boston

Kesselman: I'm not going to lie. At times it feels as if this business is impossible. Still, to this very day.

Depending on the area you want to be in, there are different paths. If you want to be a writer or a filmmaker, the best thing to start doing is just making films and writing. This is absolutely a case where you learn by doing. It's scary, but get yourself out there and start making some shorts. Also, a great way to learn is to go to a film school. Most importantly, if you believe in yourself, keep pushing. You'll persevere. People constantly will try and tell you're wrong. Know that they have no clue, and follow your heart and what makes you passionate.

Question: What was the inspiration for the film? Kurt, Boston

Kesselman: I wanted to see an butt-kicking Jew on screen.

Question: What's it like to work with Andy Dick?

Kesselman: Andy was amazing to work with. A truly gifted and brilliant comedian who brought a lot to the table in terms of improvisation. There were times when I couldn't breathe I'd be laughing so hard.

Question: How nervous were you making this film?

Kesselman: Not going to lie. Going into it, I was scared. I was always good at making movies, but my biggest budget before this film was $1,500. The scale and size of this film was huge, and at first I was also slightly intimidated by the fact I was working with movie stars. But then, your work starts, and you have to put all that aside because you have no time and no money, and you'll do whatever it takes to make something great.

Question: Will you be making more "Jewish" films in the future?

Kesselman: I just write about things in my life that I want to explore, deal with, etc. Being Jewish is very important to me, but its also one part of me. I guess in some ways, everything I do is 'Jewish' because that's who I am. My next film, however, deals with relationships, and doesn't contain a single Jewish joke.

Hillel: That ends our chat this evening. Thank you to Jonathan Kesselman and everyone who contributed their questions and thoughts. Visit Hillel's Hebrew Hammer Page to read more about the screenings of "The Hebrew Hammer" that will be held at more than 80 Hillels across the United States and Canada next week, along with "Hebrew Hammer" e-cards, Chanukah recipes and a chance to win your own copy of the DVD.